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Songs of Praise

 

Client testimonials are always reassuring. So I regularly send my clients a feedback form, inviting them to express their opinion on my copywriting services. I’ve listed below a small sample of the more flattering remarks. In no particular order…

 

“I lost my job because of you. Get lost.”
David Wells, (ex)Product Manager, ERIKS Engineering Services

 

“If you don’t stop bothering me, I will call the police.”
Jane Walker, European Director of Marketing, Epson UK

 

“The enclosed sum was nowhere near enough to get me to tell lies like you’re asking.”
Elaine Rawlings, Planning, Hertfordshire County Council

 

“Please strike us off your contacts list.”
James Henry, CEO, Digital View Group

 

“I think you may have sent this to the wrong place. Did you mean Dominion Computers, next door?”
Paul, Domino’s Pizzas

 

“A testimonial? For that rubbish? Are you joking?”
Chris Langham, MD, Bambach Ltd

 

“The work was OK, if a bit late, but providing a sign for our car park that simply said ‘car park this way’, isn’t a particularly complex project.”
Peter Palmer, Director of Advertising, Panasonic UK

 

“My teacher said it was the most boring composition she’s ever read, with LOADS of bad grammar. Its the LAST time hes doing my homework.”
Michael Croft (11), Nephew

 

“Can you return the pen you borrowed, it was a present from my daughter.”
Michelle Ford, Public Relations Team Leader, Uttlesford District Council

 

“I’d say he’s quite simply gifted. It’s probably the most inspired and creative work I – or anyone here – has ever seen.”
Bill Gates, Microsoft Corporation

 

Note: As you’ve probably guessed, one or two of these have been made up. Real versions can be provided on request.